Hundreds of you readers have told friends and co-workers about "Better Conversations," and dozens have re-published my articles in their own newsletters, blogs and in company newsletters. Thank you for that. If you want to re-publish any of my articles, you can do so if you add this contact information: From "Better Conversations" newsletter by Dr. Loren Ekroth. Reprinted with permission. Copyright 2012. Loren Ekroth is creator of "A Feast of Conversation" and "Getting to Know You Better" community events. To subscribe to free newsletter, visit www.conversationmatters.com.

Hundreds of you readers have told friends and co-workers about "Better Conversations," and dozens have re-published my articles in their own newsletters, blogs and in company newsletters. Thank you for that.

If you want to re-publish any of my articles, you can do so if you add this contact information:

From "Better Conversations" newsletter by Dr. Loren Ekroth. Reprinted with permission. Copyright 2012. Loren Ekroth is creator of "A Feast of Conversation" and "Getting to Know You Better" community events. To subscribe to free newsletter, visit www.conversationmatters.com.

If you look in a large current dictionary like Merriam-Webster, you will not find the word converser. Why, I don't know. I also don't know why this practical 3-syllable word is not preferred to the 6-syllable word conversationalist. Many English verbs become nouns by adding -er. For example, a person who plays is a player; one who bakes is a baker. Many other examples spring to mind. So why not convert the perfectly common verb converse into converser?

Question: Why not use talker instead? Because talking by itself does not necessarily suggest a mutual conversation between people. Babies may "talk," but to no one in particular. Most public speakers "talk," but only in one direction.

"The music that can deepest reach

And cure all ill, is cordial speech."

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"All politicians should have three hats - one to throw into the ring, one to talk through, and one to pull rabbits out of if elected."

- Carl Sandburg, 1878 - 1967

During which years did the "Berlin Wall" divide Berlin?

"Today's adolescents develop an accelerator a long time before they can steer and brake." -Ronald Dahl, pediatrician and developmental psychologist

"In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity"--Albert Einstein (1879 - 1955)

by John Kinde

Striking up a conversation at a business or social mixer is a common challenge. Here are some ideas to jump-start your conversation when meeting people at a mixer Tag Team Introductions. This is a technique I learned from Patricia Fripp, (www.fripp.com). When you're attending a business or social mixer, consider going with a companion. At the mixer, hang out with your friend. Be prepared to introduce each other. When introducing someone you can brag about their accomplishments. It's much more effective to have someone else brag about you, than to brag about yourself. Or in your introduction, set your partner up with the opportunity to deliver some humor. An example of bragging in an introduction: Jan Fair is a long-time friend, actor, author, brain-health expert, and pilot. I've often attended Chamber of Commerce mixers with her. "I'd like for you to meet Jan Fair. She is the author of more than 50 books." (www. Jan Fair.com) This brief introduction makes her look good and gives her credibility. It provides a curiosity point which may serve as a question-springboard for the listener, encouraging conversation. And the introduction is more effective than JAN saying, "I'm the author of more than 50 books." Here's an example of an introduction providing a humor set-up. If I were to introduce S Frank Stringham (www.scapades.com), who goes by the name S, I could say: "This is S. He's a Ham." To which he could reply: "No I'm not. Hams can be cured!" This is a joke which S often uses when anyone might say to him, "You're such a ham!" Why not deliver the set-up on purpose. It allows the listener to discover that S truly IS a ham, by getting the conversation off to a humorous start. Another example using a humor set-up. Jollytologist Allen Klein (www. Allen Klein.com) has a self-introduction line which I could borrow if I were introducing him. Part of the set-up for his joke is that he is obviously a bald man. "I'd like for you to meet Allen Klein, an expert in curing baldness." To which he would reply: "No. I'm a FORMER expert in curing baldness." And the conversation has been launched. By using an introduction with a humor set-up, I can make friends look good. Not that they need the help. My friends Jan, Allen and S are excellent conversationalists. But the introducer can make it easier for them to get a laugh or a smile right away. And that's a plus for anyone. A name badge technique. At a mixer, I could wear a name badge which said, "John Kinde. Born in North Dakota." That often inspires comeback conversation starters like: "I'm from North Dakota too (or South Dakota or Minnesota)." You could be ready with some humor lines. Someone says, "I'll bet you miss the winters." You could reply, "No. We escaped the winters by going to Canada." Or if they said, "What part of North Dakota are you from?" You could reply, "Wahpeton. When we wanted to party we went to Fargo for the weekend." Late night TV. Watch monologues like those of Jay Leno and David Letterman. If you don't stay up late, review the monologue summaries posted on the internet (www.newsmax.com/jokes). This is a conversation-preparation exercise. When conversation shifts to current events, you might be able to quote a humorous line on the topic. On the subject of establishing a moon colony, Ron Paul said: "I don't think we should go to the moon...I think we maybe should send some politicians up there..." Using this quote would allow you options. You could continue talking about the space program, or shift the conversation to politics, or talk about the use of humor in public speaking. Flexibility is the friend of the conversationalist. With a little advance thought and preparation you can make it likely that your conversations at a mixer will get off to a good start. You can ensure that a light touch is added to the mix. And you'll make your conversations more interesting and memorable. About the author: John Kinde is a Humor Specialist from Las Vegas. He publishes a free humor-skills newsletter. Subscribe at www. Humor Power.com

Striking up a conversation at a business or social mixer is a common challenge. Here are some ideas to jump-start your conversation when meeting people at a mixer

Tag Team Introductions. This is a technique I learned from Patricia Fripp, (www.fripp.com). When you're attending a business or social mixer, consider going with a companion. At the mixer, hang out with your friend. Be prepared to introduce each other. When introducing someone you can brag about their accomplishments. It's much more effective to have someone else brag about you, than to brag about yourself. Or in your introduction, set your partner up with the opportunity to deliver some humor.

An example of bragging in an introduction: Jan Fair is a long-time friend, actor, author, brain-health expert, and pilot. I've often attended Chamber of Commerce mixers with her. "I'd like for you to meet Jan Fair. She is the author of more than 50 books." (www. Jan Fair.com) This brief introduction makes her look good and gives her credibility. It provides a curiosity point which may serve as a question-springboard for the listener, encouraging conversation. And the introduction is more effective than JAN saying, "I'm the author of more than 50 books."

Here's an example of an introduction providing a humor set-up. If I were to introduce S Frank Stringham (www.scapades.com), who goes by the name S, I could say: "This is S. He's a Ham." To which he could reply: "No I'm not. Hams can be cured!" This is a joke which S often uses when anyone might say to him, "You're such a ham!" Why not deliver the set-up on purpose. It allows the listener to discover that S truly IS a ham, by getting the conversation off to a humorous start.

Another example using a humor set-up. Jollytologist Allen Klein (www. Allen Klein.com) has a self-introduction line which I could borrow if I were introducing him. Part of the set-up for his joke is that he is obviously a bald man. "I'd like for you to meet Allen Klein, an expert in curing baldness." To which he would reply: "No. I'm a FORMER expert in curing baldness." And the conversation has been launched.

By using an introduction with a humor set-up, I can make friends look good. Not that they need the help. My friends Jan, Allen and S are excellent conversationalists. But the introducer can make it easier for them to get a laugh or a smile right away. And that's a plus for anyone.

A name badge technique. At a mixer, I could wear a name badge which said, "John Kinde. Born in North Dakota." That often inspires comeback conversation starters like: "I'm from North Dakota too (or South Dakota or Minnesota)." You could be ready with some humor lines. Someone says, "I'll bet you miss the winters." You could reply, "No. We escaped the winters by going to Canada." Or if they said, "What part of North Dakota are you from?" You could reply, "Wahpeton. When we wanted to party we went to Fargo for the weekend."

Late night TV. Watch monologues like those of Jay Leno and David Letterman. If you don't stay up late, review the monologue summaries posted on the internet (www.newsmax.com/jokes). This is a conversation-preparation exercise. When conversation shifts to current events, you might be able to quote a humorous line on the topic. On the subject of establishing a moon colony, Ron Paul said: "I don't think we should go to the moon...I think we maybe should send some politicians up there..." Using this quote would allow you options. You could continue talking about the space program, or shift the conversation to politics, or talk about the use of humor in public speaking. Flexibility is the friend of the conversationalist.

With a little advance thought and preparation you can make it likely that your conversations at a mixer will get off to a good start. You can ensure that a light touch is added to the mix. And you'll make your conversations more interesting and memorable.

About the author: John Kinde is a Humor Specialist from Las Vegas. He publishes a free humor-skills newsletter. Subscribe at www. Humor Power.com

During which years did the "Berlin Wall" divide Berlin?

Loren Ekroth ©2012, all rights reserved

Loren Ekroth, Ph.D. is a specialist in human communication and a national expert on conversation for business and social life.