I've received many comments from subscribers saying that although they hunger for meaningful conversation, they cannot find it. They describe most of their conversations as ordinary, ho-hum, and boring.

One way to create more meaningful conversations is to choose more provocative topics or questions such as this one:

"If you could have learned one life lesson earlier than you did, which one would you want it to be?"

If your fellow converser agrees to engage such questions, you'll soon find your talk to be stimulating and meaningful.

Here's one to ask your dad on Fathers Day, June 17:

"During childhood, who was your best friend? What are some of your fondest memories of your times together?

Three keys for meaningful conversations:

1. The "who." (Not everyone is interested in or capable of such conversation.) Find persons who, like you, seek something more "meaty."

2. The "what." Create (or borrow) topics from many resources easily available: Books of fascinating quotations or stimulating questions. (You can find thousands of quotations here: www. QOTD.org), or a pack of cards with starters online, "TAOC, The Art of Conversation.")

3. The "where." A place with few distractions, like a quiet living room or a park bench. Noisy restaurants with frequent interruptions, not so much. (And by the way, mobile devices turned off.)

Note: Scientific research: A new study examining how conversation connects to happiness found that substantial, meaningful conversations (as opposed to small talk) may make people happier. The researchers, led by Dr. Matthias Mehl at the University of Arizona, looked at the different types of conversation that happy and unhappy people participate in.

The researchers found that the happiest people in the study engaged in only one-third as much small talk as the unhappiest participants. Happy people tended to have twice as many substantive conversations, and spent 25 percent less time alone, than the unhappiest participants. Until next time, Loren

The researchers found that the happiest people in the study engaged in only one-third as much small talk as the unhappiest participants. Happy people tended to have twice as many substantive conversations, and spent 25 percent less time alone, than the unhappiest participants.

Until next time, Loren

Until next time,

Loren

Just above the header "Better Conversations Newsletter" at the top of this issue, you'll see a Facebook icon. Clicking on that will take you to your Facebook page. The link to this issue will also appear. You can add a comment and post it and your friends will be able to access this newsletter. Thanks!

Loren Ekroth ©2012, all rights reserved

Loren Ekroth, Ph.D. is a specialist in human communication and a national expert on conversation for business and social life.